Internal tantrums

I've found, over the course of my parenting career (which is not yet an extensive one), that God uses it to teach us about Himself and about our relationship with Him. This week I had one of those aha! sort of moments along these lines.
Sometimes Keaton asks for things- OK, often Keaton asks for things. And often it's food. (He's quite a hungry little dude usually.) So let's use that as an example. It's snack time, and he asks for some raisins. OK. I give him some raisins. That's something I can say yes to.
Sometimes, though, he asks for something we're eating that he can't have. We say no, and Keaton screams and cries and throws a fit. We still have to say no, not because we're mean parents or we don't love him, but because we do love him and don't want him to choke. And besides that, we don't want him to learn that throwing a fit gets you what you want.
So the other day, Keaton was throwing a fit over something- I don't even remember what- and I thought to myself, "That's how I am with God sometimes." I want something, He doesn't give it to me, and I throw a fit. I don't cry and pound my fists like Keat does; it's usually just an internal sort of tantrum (but a tantrum nonetheless). I just get frustrated and impatient. I seem to forget sometimes that God knows better than I do what is best for me, just like a parent knows better than the child does what is best for him. I get bogged down in the thought that I want something and I want it now. I don't understand how God doesn't see that He should give it to me.
I guess that's just it... I don't understand. I have to remember that there are lots of things I don't understand. But I can have confidence that God knows what is best for me- that He knows when to give me what I want and when what I want isn't actually what's best for me. If only I could abide in that sort of faith. That's what I'm aiming for.
Lord, help me to learn from my pouting child:)

Easter

Les Petits Parlent Francais

So last Monday I started up a new French class that I'm teaching- for 1 and 2 year olds. I started it because I believe so strongly in teaching a foreign language to a child as young as possible. Nonetheless, I was a bit nervous- though excited- about it at first. I mean, I have a 1 year old myself, and I play/sing/speak with him in French, but several toddlers at once? I've never really tried to teach a group of toddlers anything, much less teach them a foreign language.
It turned out to be so much fun. Keaton, who is the youngest of the 3 students, sorta did his own thing most of the time, placating me once in a while by letting me help him do the motions to a song or two. My other two students, though, were parlez-ing French by the end of the hour. What a cool thing to hear an almost 2 year old playing and singing in French! Her mom said she was even speaking French words here and there throughout the day without being prompted by anyone. I wish I had a brain as sponge-y as theirs are.

Keaton's new wheels

The Least of These

So this blog thing was Kipp's idea... I don't really love to write. I used to. When I was in elementary school, I wrote poems and articles- even a "chapter book" or two. It seems like these days, though, I sit down to write and my mind goes blank. I feel this self-induced pressure to be as clever or witty or insightful as the latest blog post I've read of someone else's.

Well, today I'm biting the bullet and posting something myself. I'm feeling lately like writing may help me process my thoughts and emotions better. It may not be the most brilliant thing you've ever read, but I figure I'll give it a try...

Yesterday in church, the youth led the service (and did an awesome job!). Several of them talked about how the Lord has been working in their lives and what He has been teaching them. One girl talked about the burden she has for the poor- about how much the Bible has to say about the poor (which is a lot, so it must be important to God) and about how just writing a charity check doesn't really cut it (God has much more than that in mind).

I agree... but as I'm processing this, it gets more and more complicated in my mind. What does it look like to care about the poor?

Especially in this country. It seems to me that so many of the poor and/or homeless in our nation are caught in a cycle of poor choices and life-consuming addictions. That doesn't mean we can say, "Well, they screwed up their own lives. It's their own fault that they're in that situation." We still need to help them. But how? There aren't any quick fixes for most poor people in our country. We can't just give them a little food or a little pocket change and be done with it. Only life-on-life love, sharing, counseling, and teaching can break these sorts of cycles.

Then I get home from church and am taking advantage of a nice, quiet afternoon to read a little. I'm currently reading a book by an anthropologist who lived among the Beng people of Cote d'Ivoire, West Africa. In this book, she tells the story of a little baby who died of tetanus while she was there, despite her desperate efforts to save him. The unfortunate thing about the death was that it could have been prevented, had the mother been vaccinated herself against tetanus. Even more unfortunate was that a government van came to her village just two days prior to the baby's death and offered "free" tetanus vaccinations.

If the shots were free, why wasn't the mother vaccinated? She couldn't afford to pay 5 cents for a needle and 25 cents for the notebook she was required to purchase for the nurses to write her vaccination history in. So the "free" vaccine wasn't so free after all. If we give money to help Africans fight disease and food shortage, it may help some, but more is needed if these problems are to really be overcome.

But where do we start? There is so much to be done. And most of us are so far removed from these people's lives. How do we make an impact and love like Jesus loves?

Does anyone have any thoughts on any of this? I'm thinking out loud here.